so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize