break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
