She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize