I want to stick my p in your. b.
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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