just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
