More tranny stories later!
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize