so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize