dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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