Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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