Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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