5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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