marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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