I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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