Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
