while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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