shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
