I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
