yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
