ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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