What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
