alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
