Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize