Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
God I need to hump something, right now.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
