accomplished twins. life is a go
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
