I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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