and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
