just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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