ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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