You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize