How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
dude i'm inner monologue high
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
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