My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize