i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
