bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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