He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
she peed on how many people?
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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