Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
