That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize