Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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