4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize