I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
