need another drink. this is the easiest way
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
