Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
