No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
