How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
