you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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