Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I love you. Go after that dick
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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