you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
