you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize