weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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