Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize