i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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